Disrupted Adoption

If you are like me you’ve heard the stories of someone adopting a child and then it not working and the parent disrupting the adoption.  Honestly before I entered the adoption world this made me sick.  I thought the parents were awful and heartless.  I mean who would adopt a child and then change their mind.  How bad could it be?  Seriously.

Now that I’m an adoptive momma and have met many friends who’ve adopted my tune has changed when I hear these stories.  Now my heart aches for the family who no doubt made one of the, if not the, hardest decisions they’ll ever have to make.  No parent ever wants to even think about this thought.

My friend Christine wrote a beautiful post today on this subject.  I highly encourage you to go and read it.  It will stretch your mind and hopefully next time you hear of this awful tragedy happening to a child and a family your thoughts will be a little bit more compassionate and loving.

3 responses to “Disrupted Adoption

  1. John & I watched an episode on 20/20 recently about this. I think this is the episode we saw: http://tv.msn.com/tv/episode/20-20.1/adoption-disruption/

    It brought up things with adoption that we had never even considered. Unfortunately, my mom, who is a school psychologist, sees it A LOT.

  2. I watched that same 20/20 episode. It was heartbreaking.

  3. Thank you so much for this post and the link to your friend’s blog. As an adoptive mom, adoption advocate, and parent who made the heartbreaking decision to re-home an older child we adopted out-of-birth-order, I appreciate the kindness with which you addressed the issue. There are issues of safety that I personally never even considered, nor realized, when we adopted a child with a 6-year history of neglect, abuse and institutionalization. When our youngest two children were being attacked on a daily basis and our family life spiraled out of control to the point that medical professionals told us our RAD child needed to be in a home with no other children, we made the decision we once had thought unthinkable….disruption.

    That was 20 months ago, and it was a decision that we do not regret. The child we re-homed is in the best possible situation for her significant needs, and our other 3 children are healing from a year of trauma in our own home. What we realize now is that God still had a plan in our adoption of her – it was just different than we had anticipated. We were the conduit to bring a child out of another country, and the family who is raising her now is the family meant to be hers forever.

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