how things change.

It is amazing how quickly life can change.  Just when you think you know what’s going on life throws you a curve ball.  Sometimes you’re ready for it and other times you’re not.  In the past 24 hours I have been thrown 2 curve balls.  One I was ready for and one that knocked me to my knees in surprise.

As you know Fedna and Bear were scheduled to be picked up by Salem (a volunteer for MAT) in PAP tomorrow and then she would get back on a plane in PAP and head to FLL with both kids.  That is a lot of work for one person.  Bear is critical.  He needs constant care and constant watch over his “bump” on his back.  Fedna is almost three and is paralyzed from the waist down.  Salem is a champ and was prepared.  Double stroller with a special pillow for Fedna.
Sarah, Salem and I were talking last night and we thought it would be best if someone could meet Salem in Fort Lauderdale and fly back with her to Austin.  That way someone can take care of Fedna while she takes care of Bear.  Much better.  Here comes my curve ball that I was prepared for and had thought about the what if’s of me doing this.  I said “I’ll go”.  I don’t mind spending a day flying to FL and back in one day to help get Fedna.  It would give us time to “bond” and she could get to know me and it would help Salem out lots.

Great.  Plane tickets were bought last night for me.  Head out at 7AM on New Year’s Day and home by 10:30 with Fedna, Salem and Bear.  Sarah (another volunteer for MAT from Washington) and three of her kids would fly in the same day and meet us at the airport.  Sarah will be Bear’s host mom while he is here.  All the plans were laid out.  Things were in place.  Rooms were reserved at the Ronald McDonald House, doctors were on call, time was set to get to hospital, surgeries were set in place.  Yippee!

This morning I woke up with a crazy to do list going on in my head.  One of my most important things to do today was go out and find the perfect doll for Fedna.  I wanted to meet her in FLL at customs and have this doll for her.  Something she could love on and have to comfort her.  The boys were loaded in the van and I was locking the front door when my phone rang.

Here comes the curve ball I was not prepared for.  The one that knocked me to my knees.

I answer to find Salem on the other end.  It’s not happening she says.  They are not coming.  WHAT???  Did I just hear that right?  There was an error on Bear’s passport and the visa office wouldn’t even look at it.  Passport offices in Haiti are closed.  Maybe until Jan 8th.   Nothing we can do.  He can’t get his visa.  He’s not coming.  They are not coming now.

I think the earliest they can get stuff done will be January 8th.  The kids will be coming to Austin, just not when we originally thought.  I’m struggling with why God would do it this way.  Why would he allow this to happen when Bear is in critical condition and needs help soon?  I have no answers, but I do know that God is a good God and that his ways are not always our ways.  I am choosing to TRUST that he has a plan bigger than ours and that this will work out in his timing.

Selfishly I’m wishing Fedna was here this weekend.  It seems to be the perfect weekend for us. Aaron doesn’t lead on Sunday and was planning on taking the boys camping while we were at the hospital.  Once again, God’s plans are perfect even when to me they look flawed.  I’m trying to make myself understand and believe this 100%, but it’s hard when our minds tell us differently.

Please pray for Bear as he waits for possibly another week to get here.  Pray for Licia & Lori as they have worked so hard these last few days getting passport and visa appointments together.  Pray for Bear’s caregiver this week.  Give them strength and wisdom as they change his bandages.  Pray for the doctors, nurses, staff, hospital here in Austin.  Pray that schedules can be changed and that people are understanding of this being out of our control.

Curve balls.  You never know when they are coming.

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11 responses to “how things change.

  1. PRAYING!!

    Jamie. I read all of your pages yesterday. I had not realized you added them until then. Your dreams inspire! I have no doubt that you will do the task God has set before you. I could visualize your Austin land and home. I saw your beautiful smile as you greeted women and children that walked through your gates. God birthed this dream. He is the finisher of it.

    You know I have a heart for young women. I think that is why I started reading your blog. If I remember correctly Aaron told me of how you have this huge heart for women and children. I remember being so excited to read about your dreams.

    On days like today when God seems hard to understand just rest in him. He is the finisher of even your dreams. He is the God of Bear and Fedna.

    How I love you dear Friend.

  2. UGH. Sister, I’m praying. I’m praying for these sweet children, for complete protection from their Creator. I’m praying for you and your heart that you would continue to believe God’s plan and His timing. It’s usually those curve balls that radically change our hearts to look more like Jesus’. I’m praying for that for all of you.

  3. I’ve been following your blog for a while now. We’ve both been in process with our adoptions for roughly the same period of time. I think I started reading when you were in Haiti with your kids and I was in Panama with my little girl, away from my boys at home in the States, just like you were. Anyway, I totally related and I’ve been reading your blog ever since… I can also completely relate to your sentiments above. Not understanding God’s timing, but still being firm in my faith and trust in Him have been like the great theme of my life lately! 🙂

    Wish I could help with the Hatian visas, as that seems to be the real and important issue here. Can’t do that… seems no one can at the moment, but I could help with your search for a doll. 🙂 I’m a little embarrassed to offer this, so please don’t think of it as a shameless self promotion… I’ve been making dolls as an adoption fundraiser. I have an Etsy shop set up and would be happy to send you a link if you’d like. I’d be glad to make one for you free of charge. You are doing a great thing, loving Fedna in this way. It would be my pleasure to be able to make something for Fedna to love while she is here.

    • Sara – thanks so much for your comment. I think adoption always leads people to trust in God’s timing even when we don’t understand. That has been our theme for about the past 4 years through all of our adoptions!

      I would love a doll. Oh my goodness. Yes please send me the link to your store. I’d be glad to spread the word too about your fundraiser. I know that Fedna will love it and I’m happy to give her something to love on here that she can continue to love on when she goes home.

      Thanks!

  4. I am sorry for this setback. Only God knows what is in store and all we can do is hope and pray that we can handle it. I’ll keep you all in my thoughts.

  5. I don’t get it either. 😦

    Praying.

  6. I just found your blog as I was looking for information on Haitian adoptions. It’s so hard to get real answers…but that is Haiti! 🙂 We’ve adopted a little boy, Jeremy, from Haiti and have been waiting to get his visa. Unfortunately the birth father cannot be located. They’ve been looking for two months and so far…nothing. We are trying to get answers about how long they look before they stop, but as of now the only response we’ve gotten is: “the USCIS doesn’t back down on these issues.” Isn’t that discouraging?! But we trust in God. We know that He has known all along that this is the way it would go. We do not know when we’ll bring our boy home but we are thankful that it will happen some day. We were first matched with Jeremy back in December of ’06. I can hardly believe it’s been two years. We were given a 9-16 month time frame when we started, so it’s been difficult planning family trips and remaining actively doing what God has called us to do here where we are when we are thinking that we’re traveling in a couple months…oh, no. a couple more months….no, there’s a hold up here too….okay, a couple MORE months! 🙂
    Sounds like your little guy really needs to get home for medical care. How hard to be given the wonderful news of homecoming and then have it taken away. I can’t imagine the heartbreak. I will mark my calendar for Jan. 8th and be thinking about you all! I will pray for your family…peace through trusting.
    -Jenn

    • Thanks for finding the blog Jenn! I can’t believe your wait for a visa. UGH!

      The little guy we’re trying to get here is coming for medical treatment. We’re not adopting him or Fedna, just trying to help them get here! BUT yes he needs to get here soon …. like yesterday soon!

  7. I feel kind of like a stalker since I only know you through the Mercy Ministry class but I love reading your blog and I have to keep up to date on Amos and Story. 🙂 Just wanted to let you know I’m praying for the current situation with Bear and Fedna.

    Alice

  8. Pingback: Aaron Ivey » Blog Archive » Fedna and Bear delayed

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